We talked in an earlier post about why to use a coaching model. The 1, 2, 3 Coach model, also described in that post, was really helpful in the beginning. Then, to be honest, I got a bit bored with it. Coaching sessions were starting to all feel the same. And that can be one of the drawbacks of a model or a framework. After a while, even your client knows, “Okay, now they’re going to say, ‘Tell me more.'”
I also discovered that things didn’t always flow in an orderly manner with the people I was coaching. Sometimes the conversation would leapfrog in different directions.
That’s when I turned to another coaching model, Head Heart Hunch.
Head
You probably notice that some of your coaching clients do a lot of thinking. They spend the bulk of their time processing things internally. They might know this about themselves and say things like, “I’m overthinking again.”
Heart
Other people kind of feel their way to a decision, asking, “What feels right?” and “How do/will other people feel?”
Hunch
And then there are the people who make decisions from the gut level. What’s their hunch about this? What’s their gut or their instinct telling them?
While the first coaching model was all about what the coach should do, this model reverses it so as you coach, you’re listening to the client and where they’re coming from—head, heart, or hunch.
Another tool of this model is to invite the person to take a different perspective. If they’re in their head, guide them to a heart-centered place (“Now talk to me from your heart”) or towards their gut instinct (“What’s your hunch about that?”). Or if they’re focused mainly on how they feel or how others might be feeling, ask them to consider a shift (“Okay, what’s one thing you know to be true about this situation? ”).
Often these simple questions can break open someone who’s stuck.
It’s not about confronting the person or forcing them outside their comfort zone; it’s an opportunity. I might ask, “May I share an observation? What I’m hearing is that you’re spending a lot of time in your head thinking. And what I’d like to invite you to do just for a moment is to go to your heart or to your gut, and tell me what they’re saying.”
If someone is most comfortable in their head, going to the heart is uncomfortable; it’s disruptive. And that’s sometimes exactly what somebody needs. But again, we don’t push. We invite, and if they don’t want to go there, that’s fine.
The other beautiful thing about this model is that just as every client has a predominant area, so does every coach. It’s important we remember that not only do we want our clients to be able to move fluidly from head to heart to hunch, we want to do that as well.
As we wrap up this series on coaching models, the irony is that I don’t use a coaching model anymore, although I do use bits and pieces of the models I’ve tried over the years. I may use Head Heart Hunch with great results, then I may not use it again for months. Experimenting with different coaching models has definitely rounded out my coaching.
I suggest you spend some time on one model—at least a couple of months. You want to reach a point of unconscious competence, where it’s become second nature. Don’t force it or use it with everyone, especially if it’s not called for. Then, a couple of months later, try another one.
As a coach, you’ll benefit greatly from learning different frameworks and ways to work with a client. Think of coaching models as more tools for your coaching toolkit. Talk to your coaching peers and mentors. Ask which models they use. You may even get to the point of creating your own coaching model!
1, 2, 3, Coach!